He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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