I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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