forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
