someone get that fucking seahorse.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
