Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
