No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize