well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
