just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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