carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
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