I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize