Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I came so hard my ears popped.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
