Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
