you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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