it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
