you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
