I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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