God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
