Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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