I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
we're so committed to being not committed
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
