Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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