Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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