i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
