If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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