how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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