You work out of a Hotel?
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
