I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
