She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
