She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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