But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
