She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize
