I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
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