she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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