is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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