YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
