wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
So much rum. So many feels.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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