he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize