you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
