Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Randomize
