Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
