she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
