I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
