Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
