thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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