we're blogging at a bar
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
