But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Still dying that you shit outside
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
