White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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