Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
