So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
