just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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