this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Randomize
